owsf2000 | Otaku Wars! Ponderings 1

> Harold came up to TD and shook him violently. TD was shaken so hard,
>swirls appeared in his eyes. AW and Brutus came up to Harold and pulled
>him away.
>
>"Harold, don't shake him." said AW. "You need to whack him upside the
>head." AW wound up and gave a good swing upside Tuxedo Dionysus's head
>with a baseball bat. His whole body sailed sky high into the air. Brutus
>immedietly ran after TD's limp body. Harold walked slowly in TD's
>direction. TD's body peaked at the top of the parabolic arc. As it
>slowly came out, Brutus waved everyone aside.
>
>"I got him! I got him!" he yelled. TD accelerated, Brutus slid on his
>knees in order to get under the body. Unfortunetly, Brutus did not
>anticipate that there were desks nearby, and rammed into them with a loud
>CRASH! Harold calmly pointed to TD.
>
>"Foul ball." He then made a fist with his left hand and pointed his right
>index finger.

For those that don't know, TD (Tuxedo Dionysus, faction leader of the Minakochanians from 1998 to the end) was my character. I kind of forgot the abuse poor TD use to take at the hands of his loyal faction. ^_^ Yet for some reason the creativity of the punishment was probably one of the main highlights that kept me entertained in the early years when the Minpire was strong.

--
Mord
*waits for the net again*

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

See...the Endymionsamaians would have never treated you like that...hehehe...

The thing is he wants to be treated that way. He's a dirty boy who begs us for it, isn't that right? Beg, beg!

Sorry....

That's true. The Endymionsamaians don't have enough qualified members to play a 2-player teeball game. *nods sagely* :P

But if you were Mako, then you'd get respect. All you'd get was a kick in the nuts or two, tops!

almost makes me want to come out of retirement...almost... lol

Man, You just described the Galaxia-sama-ians, if you don't count the five (yes 5) NPCs we had. Crimson Jacket doesn't count as he kinda left about a year or two into it. ^^;

See, now that's depressing. At least you had other people abusing your guys. I usually had to write my own abuse. ;_;

Well, that is, up until I started hanging around you guys all the time later on. :P

Yes. We were more than happy to beat you up, burn you, steal your corpse, make fun of your shiny bald head, make you eat really gross stuff, become jobbers so you can be leader, then mock your leadership abilities, then finally stab you with a shotgun and refuse help as you get mercilessly cut to gory ribbons.

After all, that's what friends are for! :P You'd do the same for us, I'm sure. ^_^

Hey now!

You forgot to mention we stole his city from him.

Ah, memories.... ^_~ Though you all were after my time, mostly.

I do believe I wrote most of the abuse my NPCs suffered as well.

...

Is that good, or bad?

>_>;;

its just begging for a reunion show, with everyone using wheelchairs and walkers...

As I recall, my NPC's suffered a lot from me too. As for whether that's good or not, well, let us try to not think of the tortured imaginings of bloody revenge that they keep secret from us, until they are given a single chance to act.

And act they shall, if you turn your back on them, even in one fateful moment of misplaced trust.

But as I said, try not to think about that. ^_~

Nah, I already know that both SD-KM and Kane openly hate my guts. ;)

And, heck, why should I worry about my own characters ganging up on me when I had to deal with stuff like this? ^_^;

(Note: Of all of the below, I wrote only the monologue in the last paragraph. ^_^;;)

"STOP IT HERE! WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU TWO?!" A new voice
broke in as someone stupidly got between the two and shoved them
apart. "THIS IS NO WAY FOR TWO ALLIES TO BEHAVE!!"

Kobanal and ED glared at Andy and his interruption.

"Damn authors." ED's eyes narrowed.

"Wait a minute..." Andy peered more intently at the two,
"Oh shit, you guys are evil again. I didn't notice with Kobanal
looking sorta normallish compared to his evil getup... damn..."

"And thus you can die now." ED spat and pointed the Null
blaster at the doomed author even as Kobanal opened his maw at
the new target.

"If this is the case, I'll just have to unleash the most
powerful of powerful author tricks upon you both!" Andy exclaimed
and his body began to glow a rainbow of colors, mostly purplish,
but a bit of others as well just because he could.

Two balls of energy formed at the author's hands as his
eyes sparked with pure power, causing the two evilized otaku to
pause and gulp...

< Scene Switch >

"And that's how I won the battle, kids, and was forced
to strike down my friend's characters who had gone wild." Andy
nodded sagely at the young 3rd graders who were sitting on the
floor around him, listening to his tale of gore and bloodshed.

"Had they only listened to reason, I could have compromised
with the two... There had been enough death that dreaded day...
so long ago, yet it seems like it was only yesterday." He wiped
a single tear out of his eye, and then wondered who it was that
had brought onions with them for lunch. Gah, he could smell them
from here. He wiped at his eyes again and sniffed sadly.

"But Andy-sensei!" One of the little girls piped up, "If
you killed them, who are those two sitting next to you?"

"Eh?" Andy blinked, looking on either side of him to see
a mightily pissed ED and an enraged Kobanal.

"He didn't kill us girlie." ED spat, "After he waved his
arms around like a simpleton a bit more, we fired anyway but
a green robed man jumped in the way screaming 'ANDY! NO! LOOK OUT
FOR THOSE BEAMS OF DEATH AND DESTRUCTIOAAAAHAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!'"

"After the peon was vaporized," Kobanal smirked, "Andy
here ran away screaming like a girl and walked to the newbie
training camp and began talking to you little welps."

"Aw damn, the trick didn't work. But, that's what I get for
showing up in a section of the post that I didn't actually write
myself. That'll learn me. Oh well, at least I was able to finish
that other post that kills off all my other characters. Too bad
I'll be dead before I can post it. Maybe I can get Mord to... ...no,
he's dead too. Crap. Oh well, maybe Robin can post it for me after
I'm gone. Nuts, this dying thing is so inconvenient," Andy cussed,
then expired as he was impaled by a Nega Sword and a dead Llama.

Don't worry though, I'm mostly recovered by now, and the scars aren't too horrible looking.

Otaku Wars! Ponderings 1

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